You can put Sizzler on wheels, but that doesn't mean you should

If I wanted to go to Sizzler, I would. But I don't, as much as I love me some down-market food on occasion. So, if given the chance to buy lunch from a Sizzler-branded truck, would I? The obvious answer involves whether I'm stuck in the middle of nowhere with no other options. But some folks might jump at the chance, even if there's a perfectly mediocre Home Town Buffet a block away. That's what Sizzler is hoping for, anyway, as it puts its meals on wheels for the first time. The food-truck business, born in Los Angeles but spreading far and wide, is about to get more crowded as Sizzler, Shakey's Pizza, Subway, Koo Koo Roo and other well-known restaurants launch mobile versions of their brick-and-mortar venues, says the Los Angeles Times. Aside from being rolling advertisements, the trucks would bring in extra bucks, especially if they tailor their menus to on-the-go diners. So the advantage to the chains is clear. But this franchised army will suck what's left of the cool factor right out of the mobile-food phenom, which is kind of a shame. Not to mention the added traffic in gridlocked Southern California. Outta my way, Johnny Rockets truck—I'm trying to get to Olive Garden!

Grindhouse trend continues with more gritty fare from Hollywood

Why more people went to see The American, a lumbering pseudo-arthouse movie with rotten reviews, than the delightfully over-the-top Mexploitation flick Machete last weekend, I'll never understand. But there's an upside here—namely that Machete's story could continue. (Danny Trejo rode into the sunset without a scratch, and with Jessica Alba on his motorcycle, no less!) And the current grindhouse trend continues. Our brother blog Heat Vision says Eli Roth is planning his own entry in the genre, just in time for the holidays. It's dubbed Thanksgiving, and let's just assume something or somebody will get carved. A gritty, hyper-violent faux trailer for another movie, called Hobo with a Shotgun, rolled out with Machete this weekend in some markets. Filmed by Canadian Jason Eisener, it stars Rutger Hauer as a homeless vigilante. Depending on response, maybe we'll have another budding franchise on our hands. Warning: The trailer's so NSFW.

Chiquita bananas crowdsourcing designs for little blue stickers

Hey look, a banana hammock that isn't gross and awful! This design is one of 50 consumer-generated images vying to be slapped on Chiquita bananas. The marketer is toying with its iconic blue sticker—or rather, allowing others to do so—for the first time in 50 years. After collecting hundreds of new designs from the public, it's time to vote on the 50 finalists. Among the designs are lots of adorable ones—Keane-style big-eyed kids, smiley faces, monkeys. A few that are vaguely pornographic didn't make the cut, because, well, naked bananas are kind of disturbing. The finalists range from graphic to goofy, with some fine lucha libre masks in the mix. Eighteen winners will see their creations on display at grocery stores across the country. Voting ends Sunday, and results come out the next day. Check out all the submissions here.

Why aren't companies committed to easier-to-open packaging?

Amazon.com's efforts to ship things in "frustration-free packaging" (meaning no plastic cases, bubble wrap or other irritants) keeps hitting roadblocks because a lot of manufacturers, and other online retailers, are slow to adopt it. But why? It's environmentally responsible, less expensive and better for customers who hate complicated packaging. The answer, according to environmental experts like Anne Johnson of the Sustainable Packaging Coalition, is that a lot of big companies drag their heels in response to change, be it fair or foul. "One of the biggest hurdles is to convince a company that it's worthwhile, or the volume is there, to sell the same product in two different formats," Johnson tells The New York Times. Stephen Lester, science director at the Center for Health, Environment and Justice, agrees, adding that "whenever you have a system set up to run your business, making any change means time and money." Which makes a certain kind of sense. But inertia isn't a good enough excuse to ignore both customers and retail giants like Amazon. Yes, "wrap rage" is pathetic, and plastic packaging isn't a curb worth tripping over. But it is wasteful of time, resources and money. Brands that don't want to come off as unsympathetic or uncooperative need to shake the lead out and find a way to incorporate simpler packaging. If nothing else, it'll give their uppity green-local-recycled product stickers that much more credibility.

How a solid brand strategy helped Vivid conquer the porn world

You might've thought that porn DVD peddlers had gone the way of Times Square peep shows, what with the worldwide interwebs bringing in as much free smut as anyone with a DSL connection can handle. But in the case of Vivid Entertainment, you'd be wrong—to the tune of nearly $100 million a year in revenue. Obviously smarter than its counterparts in the music industry, Vivid is thriving because it's learned how to brand its product, according to our sister pub, The Hollywood Reporter, and trade heavily on two cash cows: celebrity sexcapades and superhero parodies. (The former, via Tommy Lee and Pamela Anderson's honeymoon romp, helped put Vivid on the map. The quest for stars behaving badly continues with Vivid's recent acquisitions of Montana Fishburne and Kendra Wilkinson's naughty vids.) On the caped-crusader front, there are Batman and Superman movies on the way, and there's a deep bench if you count Marvel, DC Comics and other spoofable material. Check out the THR story for more. It's OK. We know you're reading it for the numbers.

Absolut gets zesty with 'Lemon Drop' homage to 1970s movies

Quentin Tarantino is back with this short film Lemon Drop, a 10-minute webvertainment venture by TBWA\Chiat\Day on behalf of Absolut's lemony brand. The video features all the hallmarks of the director of Pulp Fiction and Kill Bill, including anachronistic fashions, odd music choices, cameos (in this case, Martin "Sensei" Kove, of the original Karate Kid) and that weird shot where the camera zooms in on something for a bit to long, eliciting unusual sound effects. In addition, the star, Ali Larter, sports a yellow outfit very similar to Uma Thurman's in Kill Bill. Oh wait, this isn't Tarantino? Oh well, it's the closest you'll get until his "slavery-packed Western" hits screens.

For Hollywood actors, voicing car commercials is getting cooler

The new trend for Hollywood actors these days seems to be car commercials. USA Today points out that Tim Allen and Robert Downey Jr. are doing voiceovers for Chevy and Nissan, respectively, joining guys like Jeff Bridges (Hyundai) and Patrick Stewart (BMW), both of whom padded their résumés and wallets with this easy, high-paying gig. We could also add Michael C. Hall's Dodge work to the list. Allen, who just voiced Buzz Lightyear in Toy Story 3, is a Chevy nut in real life who owns a personally designed 1996 Chevrolet LT5 Impala SS, among other cars, and his unsophisticated everyman identity is unbreakable thanks to his time on Home Improvement, so he's ideal for a brand like Chevy. More interesting, though, is the fact, mentioned in the article but not really explored, that few actresses get voiceover work for car commercials. Standing beside a car in a bikini, sure, but talking about cars in any depth? It's still a male province, to judge by current marketing. In an AdweekMedia/Harris poll earlier this year, 28 percent of viewers said a male voice was more likely to sell them a car, versus 7 percent preferring a female voice. Since that leaves a whopping 65 percent unaccounted for, maybe most people don't care either way. In which case, would it kill automakers to bring in some famous female voices once in a while?

DreamWorks penguins wreak havoc in new cinema spot for Intel

Those adorable penguins from Madagascar (and their own show on Nickelodeon) will hit Screenvision theaters this weekend in a new in-cinema spot for Intel. In the ad, one of the penguins (who can tell them apart?) attempts to steal the i5 processor, Pink Panther style, by dodging lasers. Of course, things go horribly wrong, and the poor bird is soon bouncing off the walls. The ad is the latest manifestation of a deal between Intel and DreamWorks. That explains why this spot exists, because it's hard to figure the target audience: kids who buy PCs or adults who get dragged to a lot of CGI films. Probably a bit of both.

'Machete' spoofs imagine other films based on racial stereotypes

Since the Mexploitation flick Machete started its life as a grindhouse trailer during Quentin Tarantino's shamefully underrated Grindhouse, it always seemed to me that its own TV advertising should've followed suit. Grainy, cheap, '70s-drive-in-quality spots that would've captured the spirit of its inspiration, a fabulous faux commercial starring Danny Trejo, and promised me it would be a bloody good time. The latter may still be true (fingers crossed), but I've been disappointed by the TV ads so far. The print campaign is slightly better, poking fun at a million action flicks that came before it. "Yesterday he was a decent man living a decent life. Now he is a brutal savage who must slaughter to stay alive. Danny Trejo is Machete." The parodies, on the other hand, are a real mixed (mostly racist) bag. Take a look at some of them here. (OK, the Cricket Bat one's kind of funny.) Meanwhile, a Fandango study found that fans want to see this hyper-violent flick because of director Robert Rodriguez, leathery leading man Trejo, and lovely Latinas Jessica Alba and Michelle Rodriguez (in that order). Nearly 60 percent of fans said they're more interested in seeing Lindsay Lohan play a naughty nun in the R-rated flick because of all her real-life run-ins with the law; 54 percent want to check in on the movie's social commentary on immigration. About that last issue, blog Ugo says the central character is "a badass Mexican sex maniac quick with gardening tools who can brawl and eat a taco at the same time." Decide for yourself if you're offended. The movie opens today.

Xerox happy to welcome other brands into its latest ad campaign

Xerox is gambling a little bit, some believe, by featuring some of its clients in a new advertising campaign. Called "Ready for Real Business," the campaign will showcase big-name brand icons, like Mr. Clean and the Target bulldog, from companies that employ Xerox for generic office labor. Young & Rubicam will make the initial print and TV ads, and the range of brands Xerox is partnering with is pretty wide, including a hotel chain, a motorcycle manufacturer and the University of Notre Dame. The supposed risk with this kind of advertising is twofold: Other brands don't want to play second fiddle to Xerox, and Xerox doesn't want those familiar brands overshadowing its own. No use spending millions on a campaign if everyone who sees it walks away singing the Notre Dame fight song. But Xerox's chief marketing officer, Christa Carone, is optimistic, mentioning to Forbes that some execs wanted to see their brands promoted in media where Xerox advertises but consumer brands don't. I'm still somewhat repulsed by multiple brands occupying the same ads, though. It seems a bit like cousins kissing to me.